Victimhood - A serious matter. Part 1

✨ Playing a Victim? Or around one?
Read on..

First things first. No one would ever like to confess that they are playing the victim. Hence, its really out of question to ask people - "Hey! Why do you always play the victim?" You might be condemned outright. Jokes apart, this is a very serious and sensitive matter.

Here are 7 ways to identify if you or anyone else is playing the victim:

1. ALWAYS OFF
The victim is someone who is always sulking. There is absolutely nothing in their life to be happy about. Or rather, they are adept in spotting sadness in a happy situation as well. And they are the ones, who, knowingly or unknowingly will put others off as well. With their sullen faces 24x7. Everything around them turns gloomy automatically.

2. EVERYTHING WRONG IS DONE TO THEM AND THEM ALONE.
The victim feels that all the wrong doings in and around, are done only and only with; and to them. They feel that theirs is the most terrible situation. And that everyone likes to pick on them. They feel targeted even when the point of discussion is not them.

3. FEEL SORRY FOR THEMSELVES ALL THE TIME.
The victim will feel sorry for themselves every moment. They feel that their pain, trouble and struggles are the most difficult and constantly feel unfair that they alone, are dealing with the darkness of the world. They feel that they are the only ones to carry the burden of the whole world, hurt and pain on their shoulders.

4. THEY THINK YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
"You never understand the pain I go through. The sacrifices I have made. You don't even know what I am going through." Are among the favourite sentences a Victim likes to use. They always feel no one, on this planet understands them.

5. MANIPULATION AND GUILT
The victim will manipulate all the conversations and turn them against you. They will make you feel guilty with their words by telling you how much pain you have caused them by your words. They will go silent for periods to show you how deeply you have hurt them. Not talking with anyone, keeping mum purposely in the middle of a conversation is what they like to do. 

6. DENIAL
The victim outrightly denies everything told to them. They will never accept the truth, instead talk you into how sorry they feel for themselves. It's a blow to their ego to accept their flaws. Pointing them out means triggering more sorry feelings and self pity in them. And thus, they hardly learn their lessons. Because they cannot accept.

7. THEY COME ACROSS AS VERY POSITIVE AND STRONG.
Ever heard about reverse psychology? The victim knows how to use it well. They project themselves to be the most strongest. Being vulnerable with their feelings in front of others is a big no no to them. Where as in reality, all they want is sympathy and attention. And they very well get that by talking about their "so called sorry feelings and self pity" in stylish and most positive ways.

Know that we all play victim at some point in time. And its okay. When we genuinely feel like one, its okay to feel it fully, learn from it and let that feeling GO. However there is a difference in feeling it as a vulnerability and being in victimhood 24x7.

How to differentiate it and know that you are learning from it, is coming up in the next write up. Stay tuned.. Aho! 💙💚💙